Wednesday, July 4, 2007 @ 8:32 PM
its 7.45pm
and im sitting on the mrt typing this entry.
sometimes i get so sick of the long commute hours that i have to make every weekday.
just sitting there and stoning, and watching the blurry faces of the people who are walking
in and out of my life in that few seconds or minutes.
most of the times, i will just sigh to myself to remind that im still alive or just sighing
because of the fact that i still have a 45 mintues journey left to make before reaching home.
but occasionally, i love the solitude that the commute offers. where no one knows me and
i can just get lost in my own world.
i find that i am a very contradictory person. sometimes more towards pessimistic.
whats worse is that i am very vague. Very very.
i do have an idea on what i want or need.
but i dont like to explain it to anyone. even if i do, i just give a very brief idea and let
them figure out the rest for themselves. cause i realise a long time ago that no one is
really listening or understanding what you are trying to get across. why waste my energy
unless there is really a cause or people that are worth my time and energy.
so i guess im more of a listener rather than a talker. which to me isnt such a bad things cause sitting back and letting the
words of the speaker wash over me can be quite soothing or trying to give advice about stuff.
heh, i laugh more than i speak.
people do get irritated that i am always laughing. i try to see humour in everything.
i do not want to live my life solemnly.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
my friend commented that i dont have the heart to study after asking me about my results which
were horrendously terrible. never in my life have i failed so many subjects at one go.
im so screwed in my studies.
whatever goals i made at the beginning of my second year academic term was not achieved at
all except that i went back to what i love to do, which was joining SP Voices.
i have to say that i didnt regret joining and i definitely did not regret the friends that
i have made over there. ( you guys rock!)
i have no idea what i want to do in the future. engineering is definitely out unless a
miracle happen suddenly and i start getting As in everything and end up in London doing my
undergraduate studies on a scholarship.
i love singing but somehow i feel that im inadequate in certain aspects. so thats an out too no matter how much i desire to be a singer whether isit choral or acapella or opera.
i sound like im having a mid life crisis. =.=
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
sighs.
i reach home finally.
so fatigued.
=.=
well, i still have to go for my run.
0.0
craps
a mock test report is due tml. shit.
mum is super irritating right now.
nagging at me non-stop.
=.=
thats why i dont like to go home so early. if i do reach home early, i will lock myself up
in my room and rot inside it.
sighs. shit shit shit.
lots of thoughts are going through my mind right now. *dismay*
anyway, ending this so screwed entry right now and start getting ready for my run.
till the next..